Saturday, September 8, 2012

Turner Classic Movies Delivers an Elvis Bonanza on August 16

If you can’t get to Elvis Week in Memphis this year, there is one other way for fans to get our Elvis fix.  Turner Classic Movies has lined up fourteen Elvis movies for us on Thursday, August 16.

As a public service to help you plan your viewing schedule in advance, ElvisBlog is happy to present the TCM lineup.  In addition, some unusual ranking data will be shown.  It comes from the book Hollywood Rock by Marshall Crenshaw.

The book gives each movie a short review and assigns it up to five stars in three categories – Music, Attitude, and Fun.  Music is self-explanatory.  Attitude is explained as reflecting how well a movie succeeds on its own terms (whatever that means).  Fun is meant to gauge whether the film works as entertainment overall.  Also, for some movies, a special scene or line of dialog (some good, some bad) is noted.

Here is the TCM schedule for August 16:

 

6:00am           It Happened at the World’s Fair

    1. Music  **
    2. Attitude *
    3. Fun  *

Elvis Line: “Calm down, honey.  Racing that sweet little engine of yours on a hot day, that’s bad.”

.

8:00am           Kissin’ Cousins

    1. Music  ****
    2. Attitude ****
    3. Fun  *****

Scene : The Army Guys give bikinis (purdy underwear) to the mountain girls as a bribe to win them over.

.

9:45am          Girl Happy

    1. Music  ****
    2. Attitude **
    3. Fun  ***

Line by Elvis Friend: (Describing the perfect girl)  “Not much upstairs, but what a staircase.”

Scene : Elvis dresses in drag to escape from jail.

 

11:30am          Harum Scarum

    1. Music  **
    2. Attitude **
    3. Fun  ****

Elvis Line: “I’m in love with your daughter.  How could I assassinate you?”

 

1:00pm           Double Trouble

    1. Music  ***
    2. Attitude **
    3. Fun  **

Line to Elvis by a Friend:  “Must be the maternal instinct you bring out in chicks.  Them mothers can’t live without you.”

.

2:45pm           Stay Away Joe

    1. Music  **
    2. Attitude ****
    3. Fun  ***

Elvis Line: “She can chew on my moccasins anytime she wants to.”

Scene: Elvis fights a bunch of guys and totally destroys his family’s house.

.

4:30pm           Charro

    1. Music  **
    2. Attitude *
    3. Fun  *

(Ed. note:  How do you give Music two stars when the only song is the title track played over the opening credits?)

.

6:15pm           The Trouble with Girls

    1. Music  **
    2. Attitude **
    3. Fun  *

Line to Elvis:  “The cannibals are complaining that their mattresses are too lumpy.”  Elvis Line:  “I told them to quit eating ‘em.”

.

8:00pm           Elvis on Tour

Concert Documentary – Not in book

.

9:45pm           Jailhouse Rock

    1. Music  ***
    2. Attitude ****
    3. Fun  **

Elvis Line: “That ain’t cheap tactics, honey.  That’s the beast in me.”

.

11:30  Viva Las Vegas

    1. Music  ***
    2. Attitude ****
    3. Fun  *****

Scene: Elvis’ performance of “What’d I Say” in a crowded nightclub is both a reverie and a orgy.

.

1:00am Speedway

    1. Music  **
    2. Attitude ***
    3. Fun  **

Scene: Elvis’ “love-trap” trailer – equipped with recordings of wild animals, fake radio announcements, and a remote controlled clock to assist him in his merry persuit.

.

2:45am           Spinout

    1. Music  *
    2. Attitude *
    3. Fun  *

4:30am           Live A Little, Love A Little

    1. Music  **
    2. Attitude **
    3. Fun  ****

Scene: Elvis’ psychedelic dream in which the dog speaks to him, and where Elvis sings a song with the lyrics, “The girl with the nameless name.”

 

 

So, according to the multiple stars rating system used in the book Hollywood Rocks, the best two Elvis movies to watch on August 16 are Kissin’ Cousins and Viva Las Vegas.   I’ve got no argument with that and plan to watch both.  However, the music of Viva Las Vegas deserves four stars, too.

There is a three-way tie for the next highest rating – Girl Happy, Jailhouse Rock, and Stay Away Joe.  Now that’s just ridiculous.  Stay Away Joe is an embarrassment, depicting Native Americans as irresponsible louts interested in only drinking, fighting, and chasing girls.  It won’t be on my viewing list, but the other two definitely will.  I can’t understand how the reviewer gave Jailhouse Rock only three stars for music.  Come on, there’s six songs by Leiber and Stoller in the movie.

And the film with the dead last stars rating is Speedway.  They got that right.   No wonder it is scheduled for 2:45 in the morning.  The movie that follows it is Live A Little, Love A Little at 4:30am.  I love this one.  It’s just so stupid and bizarre.  Live A Little gets five stars for fun from me, and that’s why I’ll be setting the alarm to be sure I get up to see it.

Hope you all have a fun day watching Elvis movies next Thursday.

 

©  2012    Philip R Arnold, Original Elvis Blogmeister    All Rights Reserved    www.ElvisBlog.net

 

Elvis, Elvis Presley, and Graceland are registered trademarks of Elvis Presley Enterprises, Inc.

 

Source: http://www.elvisblog.net/2012/08/10/turner-classic-movies-delivers-an-elvis-bonanza-on-august-16/

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